Funny SMS

1.Whan i call u, 1 ring means i' m thinking of u, 2 rings means i like u, 3 rings means i'm missing u, 4 rings means i need u, 5 rings mean.. BEHRE HO PHONE UTHAO JULDI!

2.Pathan sitting on the top of the mountain and studying.. When a person askied what he was doing.. He replied.. Oye! higher studies yaar...
3.Doctor says to pathan: Appka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai? Pathan: Hoga zaror hoga; 25 saal se amara koon peeta aay..!

4.Khidki se deakho to raste pe koi nahi tha, Khidki se dekha to raste pe koi nahi tha, Raste pe ja ke dekha to khidki pe koinahi tha...
5.Jab barish hoti hai, Tum yaad aate ho. Jab kali ghata chaye, Tum yaad ate ho,Jab bheegte hain tum yaad aate ho, Bataoo Meri umbrella Kab wapis kro ge!

6.Kaise ho? maze me? tabiyat kasei? ungli me dard nahi na? aankh bhi ok? dimag thikane? Kaamal ha yar fir to SMS kar sakte ho!
7.Aapke life mein mithas ho cadbury jaise, ronak ho nerolac paint jaise, mehak ho axe jaise, tazgi ho colgate jaise, aur tenssion free rehe huggies jaise!
8.God ne tujhe bheja to bheja, lekin behja to aisa bheja ki behje main bheja hi nahi bheja, Ye mujhe kise ne bheja, isliye maine tujhe bheja!

9.Sharab bani to Maikhane bane..Husn bana tu Deewane bane.. kuch tu baat he aap mai, yu hi nahi pagal khane bane.. kesa laga

10.Abhi bole to bhai ko tere SMS nahi aarele, Bhai ka khopdi boht tight he, Bol nikalu kya tera luky draw? bole to do-char SMS chipka dal mamu. Sender...Circuit Bhai.!

11.Haqeeqat karo byaan to mazaak lagta hai,ibadat karo jab to jhootha khwab lagta hai,Are ye dil hai dil, aur dil ki hai ye sdaa,aur tum kehte ho ki tumhe ye haseen ittfak lagta hai...


12.zindagi mauhtaj nhn manzilon ki, waqt har manzil dikha deta hai, kon marta hai kisi ke liya, waqt sab ko jeena sikha deta

13.ya dil pyar ke qabil na raha,Koi bhi izhar ke qabil na reha,is dil main bas gayi dosti aapki ab tu chand bhi deedar ke kabil na raha

14.kal ho na ho...Aaj tu hai...Aaj ho na ho...Ya pel tu hay...Ya pel ho na ho...Hum tu hia...Hum ho na ho...Humari dosti tu hai


15.HUM AAP KO KABHI KHONEY NAHIN DENGE JUDA HONA CHAHA TO BHI HONE NAHIN DENGE CHANDNI RATON MEIN AYE GI MERI YAAD MERI YAAD KE WOH PAL AAP KO SONE NAHIN DENGE

16.Log apna banake chod dete hai.Rishta gairo se jod lete hai..Hum to ek phool bhi na tod sake.Log to dil bhi tod dete hai

17.Phool bina.....Khushboo bekaarChand bina.....Chandni bekaarPyar bina.....Zindagi bekaarMere SMS bina.....Tumhara MOBILE bekaar!!!!!

18.Aap aik brilliant, beautiful, genius, smart, nice, gud looking, intelligent, respectful, kind, ideal larkay/larki ka sms par rahe ho.

19.Majnu Ko Laila Ka Sms Nahi Aiya..Majnu Ne 3 Din Se Khana Nahi Khaya..Majnu Marne Wala Tha Laila Ke Pyar Mai..Aur Laila Bethi Thi SmS Free Hone Ke Intezar Mai..

20.Aap jaise log hume kuch khas lagte hai. mann me har waqt hum ek aas rakte hai, jaane kab aa jaye sms aapka is liye cell ko dil ke pass rakte hai


21.Mere Dil, Jiger, Kidney, Liver ho tum .. waqt-bewaqt aaye vo fever ho tum .. Doob kar jisme marr jayu vo River ho tum .. Mere jeevan mein ab to forever ho tum...

22.Sunsaan sarak k sookhay hoi peepalKi Tuti Hui Tehnee k Murjhaye Hue Pattay Pay BaithayHue bhoot Kay Pair Say Nikaltay Hue KhoonKay Beemar Bacteria............HOW R U??????

23.Is Dil mein aansuyo ke mele hain Tum bin hum bohat akele hain Sab kuch chor kar tumeh e-mail karte hain Dekho hum kitne vele hain


24.Har des ki ek sarhadd hoti hai , bache ki bhi ek zidd hote hai aur kitna intzaar karru tere sms ka, Kanjosi ki bhi koi hadd hoti hai

25.jawaab teri shayari ka.... denge hum shayari mein.... naam tera likh baithe hain.... apne dil ki diary mein


26.Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain Yeh to unke bache hee kamine hain, Jo Mammu-Mammu bulaate hain

27.Jis mehfil mein khare hojai, waha Hrithik bhi jhukta hai,Kaho Na Pyaar Hai, Kya mooh dukhta hai ?


28.Kaun sa gham hai jo yeh haal bana rakha hai, na to makeup hai,na baalon ko sajaa rakha hai, aur khama-kha cherti rehti hai yeh rukhsaaron ko, Tum ne zulfon ko bohut sar pe chara rakha hai


29.Umeedo ki manzil toot gayi, aankho se ashqo ki dhara beh gayi are tumahri bhi kya izaat reh gayi, jab class ki ladki bhaiya keh gayi


30.Arz kiya hai..... Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai , wah wah! wah wah! Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai , khafa ho humse ya balance kam hai? ha ha ha ha.....


31.Tammana se nahi tanhai se darte hain, pyaar se nahi ruswaai se darte hain,milne ki to bohat chahat hai, par milne ke baad judaai se darte hain


32.Dil torna humari aadat nahi, Dil hum kissi ka dukhate nahi Bharosa rakhna meri wafaon pe, Dil mein basa kar hum kissi ko bhulate nahi


33.You r my sweet SONA, I don't want u KHONA, I want a place in your heart's KONA,Otherwise i will start RONA, Atleast Good Morning to kar LONA


34.Jab i ne U se pyaar kiya, to night ko sleeping chor diya, tere face ki gentle beauty ne, mere kind heart ko phor diya


35.Yaad mein teri aankhe bharta hai koi, har saans ke saath tujhe yaad karta hai koi, maut to sachai hai aani hai, lekin teri judaai mein har roz marta hai koi....!


36.Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye,Aaj vo humse jannat mein takra gaye, Aur humare dil se awaaz nikalii...., Fiteh Mooh...Tusin Ethe vii aa gaye !!!

37.Jab Jab hume pyaas lagti hai, Unke aane ki aas lagti hai unki dewangi mein hum ho gaye itne dewane, Ki har ladki ki maa apni saas lagti hai


38.When u feel, That nobody loves u, Nobody cares 4 u, & every 1 is ignoring you, N hating u, U should ask urself, Sala ... Chakkar kia hai

39.Ek aadmi apni biwi ka antim sanskar kar ke, Ghar ja raha tha ke achanak bijli, Chamki, Badal garje, Zor se barish shuru hoi, Aadmi bola lagta hai pahunch gai.

40.Tu chand mange main chand dedu, Tu raat mange mein raat dedu, Tu dil mange main dil dedu, Tu jaan mange: bas yaar…. Bheek mangne ki bhi koi limit hoti hai!

41.Dil main basa hay piar tera, Aankhoon main basi hai tasveer teri, Jab bhi yaad aati hai teri, Hum deekhtay hain “tom and jerry”.

42.Jo kissi kissi ko milay who hai pyaar, Jo naseeb waloo ko milay who hai apun ka sms!!!

43.Sitam sehnay ki hadh hoti hai, Pas na aane ki hadh hoti hai, Ruth jane ki hadh hoti hai, Aik sms to kar day zalim, Kanjoosi ki bhi hadh hoti hai

44.When words fail, Eyes Work, When Eyes fail, Heart Works, When Heart fail... To kya? Samjh ke tapak gaya. MAMU..!

45.Two snakes sitting in the jungle, Female snake tried to kiss the male snake, Suddenly male snake turned and started singing 'zehar hai ki pyat hai tera chumma'!

46.Ager dum hai tu is sawal ka jawab yes or no me deke batao ... .... ... kya aapko pagalpan ke dure padhne band ho gaye hai?


47.Palko pe apni baithaya hai tumhe, badi dino ke baad paya hai tumhe, aasani se nahi mile tum, National Zoological park se churaya hai tumhe:!


48.Kaise ho? maze me? tabiyat kasei?ungli me dard nahi na? aankh bhi ok? dimag thikane? Kaamal ha yar fir to SMS kar sakte ho!

49.Taza hawa ka jhoka aaya.. Khushbu teri sath laya...Phir mere dil me khayal aaya...Ke lagta hay ki...Aaj bhi tu.. Nahi "NAHAYA"

50.Abe o burai ke resgulle, Pap ki berfi , Bewafa ke laddu, Matlabi chuski,Badmashi ke pedhe, Jhoot ke kalakand.. Tu bada hi sweet hai re..


51.Aahat si koi aye to lagta hai ki tum ho. Hawa koi lehrayi to lagta hai ki tum ho. Ab tum hi batao, kya tum kisi BHOOT se kam ho ?

52.Ikhtiyarre tabbasum ki lau ko tarranume numayish se aghaa dena... Jo iska matlab samajh aaye to please mujhe bhi bata dena

53.When i was sad you were there. When i was crying you were there. When i was unhappy you were there. Now i have understood ki sare fasad ki jad tu hai..

54.Aisi dosti hamari ki tu har rah,har dagar,har safar mein mile. Mar bhi jaun agar,tab bhi dosti ki khatir,tu bagal wali kabar mein mile :)

55.Har des ki ek sarhadd hoti hai , bache ki bhi ek zidd hote hai aur kitna intzaar karru tere sms ka,Kanjosi ki bhi koi hadd hoti hai

56.Shah Jahan Ne Taj Mahal Ki Har Deewar Ko Dekha, Har Meenar Ko Dekha, Har Kaleen Ko Dekha, Har Khidki Se Dekha... Aur Bola... Maa Kasam, Bahut Kharcha Ho Gaya !!!

57.Aey Mere SMS Mere Dost ke Pass Jana... Agar wo so Raha ho to Shor Mat Machana,Jab WO jage to Dhire Se'MuskaranA' Fir Kehna "KANJUS"SMS Karo


58.Hichkiyon se ek baat ka ehsaas hai ke shayad koi hamen yaad to karta hai beshak milne na aaye per chandh lamhen hum per barbaad to karta hai.!

59.Aapki yaad me mene kalam uthai,lia kagaz, tasvir apki banayi, socha tha dil se laga ke rakhe us tasvir ko, par wo toh bacchon ko darane ke kaam aayi

60.i selected a short girl to marry............why? coz some one told me museebat jithni choti ho utna acha

61.baap ne kaha ghar chhod do, ma ne kaha paro chhod do, paro ne kaha sharab chhod do, chndrmuki ne kaha timepass karna chhod do, ek din tum kahoge sms bhejna chhod do

62.Andhe ke hath me "TORCH", Bahare ke hath me "RADIO",Gunge ke hath me "MIKE",AUR AAP KE HATH ME "MOBILE"WAH WAH Kya zamana Aaya hai!!!****

63.HAR KASHTI ka sahil nahi hota kimti chiz ke har koi kabil nahi hota,..Ye to tumhari kismat aachi hai varna tumhare jaise ,ladko, ke paas mobile nahi hota

64.teachar: kal tum school kyun nahi aaye? student: gir gaya tha aur lag gayi. teacher: kaha gir gaya aur kya lag gayi? student: palang par gir gaya aur aakh lag gayi

65.Andheri sadak sunsan kabristan sooni haveli kala aasman ,bijli kadki aaya toofan ,raat ho gayi soja shaitan.Good Night

66.Sunsaan sarak k sookhay hoi peepal Ki Tuti Hui Tehnee k Murjhaye Hue Pattay Pay Baithay Hue bhoot Kay Pair Say Nikaltay Hue Khoon Kay Beemar Bacteria............HOW R U??????

67.Chaand ko garoor hai ki uske paas noor hai, to kya hua.... Mujhe bhi garoor hai ki mera Dost Langoor hai!

68.Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain Yeh to unke bache hee kamine hain, Jo Mammu-Mammu bulaate hain.

69.Child : - uncle mujhe na Bandar dekhna hai Uncle : - Beta vo abhi SMS padh raha hai.


70.Jab barish hoti hai, Tum yaad aate ho. Jab kali ghata chaye, Tum yaad ate ho,Jab bheegte hain tum yaad aate ho, Bataoo Mera Chatri Kab Do ge!

71.Kaise ho? maze me? tabiyat kasei? ungli me dard nahi na? aankh bhi ok? dimag thikane? Kaamal ha yar fir to SMS kar sakte ho!

72.Pathan sitting on the top of the mountain and studying.. When a person askied what he was doing.. He replied.. Oye! higher studies yaar...

73.Khidki se deakho to raste pe koi nahi tha, Khidki se dekha to raste pe koi nahi tha, Raste pe ja ke dekha to khidki pe koinahi tha...

74.Aapke life mein mithas ho cadbury jaise, ronak ho nerolac paint jaise, mehak ho axe jaise, tazgi ho colgate jaise, aur tenssion free rehe huggies jaise!

75.Suchta tha har mor per aap ka intezar karenge.. per, per, per, per, per, per, per, per, per, kambhakat sadak hi sidhi nikli.

76.Message pe message bhejte ho, bhej bhej ke bheja kharab karte ho, bhejte ho toh bhi kya bhejte ho, khudka bheja to chalta nahi dosron ka bheja hua bhejte ho!!

77.Terrorists have kidnapped our lecturers... and demanded aransom of 500000 rs or else they will burn them with kerosene... plz donate. i have donated 15 litres.

78.The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn’t it rain on you?

79.pathar se dosti, jaan ko khatra,sardar se dosti, dimaag ko khatra,sarab se dosti, lever ko khatra,humse dosti, waqt bewaqt sms ka khatra.

80.Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye, I don"t worry I don"t cry, I"m just happy that cows can"t fly!

81.If ur world is spining Round & Round..& Round....Ur heart is beating fast ,do u think its LOVE? na Munna na its called high B/P...

82.Who said english is easy???Fill in the blank with YES or No... 1.-----I dont have brain... 2.-----I dont have sence... 3.-----I am

83.Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE- C-Come,O-On,L-Lets, L-Love, E-Each,G-Girl,E-Equally......Thats why boys go to college regularly....

84.Ham ap ka Ghar Zaroor aien gay.
Har Waqt Aien Gay.
Har Pal Aien Gay.
Har Rooz Aien Gay.
Aur
Ghanti Baja kar Bag Jaein Gay.
85.kia wo aie?
kia wo nahee aie?
kia wo aie ge?
kia wo naheen aie ge?
lagta ha wo agai.
ap ka face par cute si
"Smile"

86.Girlfriend Ko I LUV U Bolna Hai ? Balance Khatam ? Ab Kya Karoge ? Kabutar K Gale Mein Bandh K CHITTHI Bhejoge ? Nahi Na.......... Main Batata Hoon Kya Karna Hai.... Girlfriend Ka Number Mujhe De Do Main I LUV U Boldeta Hoon!

87.Hamari tumahari dosti duniya ke liye ek mishl hai tumhe dekha to esa laga kya mal hai is mal ko pane ke liye bichaya jal hai pa kambhakat collage ka akhiri saal hai.

88.Paani main tairna machali ka style, Hawa main udna paanchi ka style; Different SMS bhejna apunka style, fukaat main SMS padhna aapka style.

89.TERE GAM ME TADAP KE MAR JAYENGE, MAR GAYE TO TERA NAAM LE JAYENGE, RAB KO RISHWAT DE KE TUJHE BHI BULANENGE, UPAR SAATH BAITH KE KURKURE KHAENGE.


90.Jab 50-50 km. DUur koi baccha rota hai hoooo....... .Oooo...to uski Maa bahut khush hoti hai aur kahti hai uska beta bada hoke"HIMESH RISHMYA" Banega. :-D

91.Har gali har chorahe par tumhara naam hai, Har gali har chorahe par tumhara naam hai, .... upar likha hai chappal chor, niche 5 rupees inaam hai :-D

92.A:u r Active B:u r Best C:u r Cute D:u r Dashing E:u r Excellant F:u r alwayz 1st G:u r Gr8 Sorry Z tak jhooth bolne ki himmat mujhme nahi hai! :-D


93.Teri zulfo mein kho jaana chahata hoon, Teri zulfo mein kho jaana chahata hoon...? Par tu taaeel hi itna lagati hai k har bar fisal jata hoon.. :-D

94.Dekh k logoko,socha ishq hum b karle... phir bewafao ko dekh socha,thoda sabr karle....... jaan gawante dekh is daldal me kaio ko.... Socha patli gali se hm Nikl len...

95.Aap itna yaad na karo hum ko, kahi hum chheenko se pareshan na ho jaye. Yaad to hum bhi apko bahut karte hain,Par darte hain k kahin aapko zukaam na ho jaye


96.Har des ki ek sarhadd hoti hai bache ki bhi ek zidd hote hai aur kitna intzaar karru tere sms ka Kanjosi ki bhi koi hadd hoti hai


97.jawani ke din chamkile ho gaye aur husn ke tewar nukile ho gaye hum izhaar karne me thode dhiile ho gaye aur unke haath peele ho gaye


98.You r my sweet SONA I don"t want u KHONA I want a place in your heart"s KONA Otherwise i will start RONA Atleast Good Morning to kar LONA


99.Arz kiya hai..... Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai wah wah! wah wah! Aaj-kal aapke SMS aana band hai khafa ho humse ya balance kam hai? ha ha ha ha.....


SARDAR JEE !

1 Sardar: Yar jab main chota tha tab main 5 Mannzlia Building se gira tha.2 Sardar: Yar tu mar gya tha ya bach gya tha.
1 Sardar: Kaisi baatein karte ho muje kya pata tub main bohat chota tha.
Sardar: Shirt K Liye Badhiya Kapda Dikhana?SalesMan: PLAIN Me Dikhau?Sardar: Hawai Jahaaz Tak Jaane Ki Kya Jarurat Hai? Yahi Dikha Do na.
Ek Sardar Apna Marriage Certificate ku 1 hour se Dekh raha tha.Begam Ai Booli, Tusi inni Dair Say Kia Dekh Rahe Hu?Sardar Bola, Expiry Date Dekh raha hoon......
dolhan sardar say......aag mojhay itna khush karo k main sari zindgi yaad rakhoon sardar saari raat gud gudi karta raha
Ek Sardar Apna Marriage Certificate ku 1 hour sae Dekh raha tha.Begam Ai Booli, Tusi inni Dair Say Kia Dekh Rahe Hu?Sardar Bola, Expiry Date Dekh raha hoon......
Ek sardar exame dene gaya to apnay saath palumber ko saath le kar gaya.guess karo kyun le kar gaya?aray yaar simple hai us ko yeh news mili thi k paper leage ho gaya. ha ha ha
Sardar 2 hotel manager: Jaldi chalo, meri biwi khidki se kud kar jaan dena chahti hai" .... Managr: wht can i do? .. Sardr: Abe,khidki nahi khul rahi hai :-)
Friend to sardar: yaar tu aaj to doctor ke pas jane wala tha kya huva?.. sardar replies- aaj meri tabiyat theek nahi hai kal jaoonga...
Sardar rail mein susu karne gaya. Wapis aane par,wife :aapka paajama geela kaise hua?Sardar,"vahan likha tha,shareer ka koyi angh baahar na nikaalen!!
Man: Oye tera ek dant neela kida ho gaya? Sardar: Yaar main ink lagayi hai. Man: Uh kyon? Sardar: Kyon k aaj kal BLUE TOOTH bahut mashur hai
strange man. Friend: Didn"t u follow them? Sardar: No yaar, i have already seen that movie :-)
Shayari by sardar:- khidki se dekha to road pr koi nai tha..Khidki se dekha to road pr koi nai tha..Road pe jake dekha to khidki me koi nai tha :-)
INTERVIEWER: Imagine that u r in a closed room and all doors and windows r closed.How can u Escape if d room got FIRE? SaRDAR: simple..Stop Imagining
A Sardar and wife waiting 4 TRAIN, itne me "PUNJAB MAIL" aayi.Sardar bag k train me chada or wife se bola "jab PUNJAB FEMALE aye to aa jana!!!
Aik sardar bachpan se heiraan pareshaan rehta tah yeh soch ker k meri behn k do bhai phir mera aik kaise .
Sardar watching star tv.. Bech main advertize aya "aap dekh rahe hai "star tv".. Sardar bola, in tv walo ko kaise pata chala ke mai star tv dekh raha hu......
EK SARDAR NE SABHI DOSTON KO SMS KIYA, ""MY MOBILE NUMBER HAS CHANGED, EARLIER IT WAS NOKIA 2100 NOW IT IS NOKIA 6600"" !!
Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why ? Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office
Ek sardar gusse main: Oyye, main iss duniya ko mita dunga, mita dunga aur mita dunga !! Dusra sardar: Main tujhe rubber hi nahi dunga !!
Q. What frustrates a Sardar? ... A. When his wife delivers twins & he can"t find the father of the second child.

Adult
Chacha chachi donon lafangay,so rahay thay donon nangay,chachi ko lagi thand,chacha nay dia lund,chachi boli yah kia gund,chacha bola machine gun,dhasaan dhasan.. dhasaan dhasaan...
Chinese Couple: A Chinese couple Mr and Miss Hua got twins without marriage. What did they named them? They named them as "Jo-Hua", "So-Hua"
Kon kahta hay dost humari chudai hogi,yah afwa kisi bhanchod nai urai hogi,ghuss k teri gand mai rahain gay sada,itni jaga tu hum nain banai hogi
Q: What is the difference b/w Secretary & private secretary?
Ans:Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR&Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
Sales Girl: sorry sir you cann"t smoke here.Customer: but i bought cigarate from this shop.Sales Girl: we sell condom also but it dosn"t mean you start fucking here.
A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams,whichthe father receives as:"father, your daughter has been successful in BED."
Father: Tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye?Son: Mujhe chand jai si biwi chahiye, Jo raat ko aaye aur subha chali jaye...
Musharraf said to his mother. Ammi mari B.V , M.M.A walon sey meli hoi hai! Jab bhe kamray main jata hoon kehti hai wardi utaro...
A boy and gal of 5th class asked teacher "kya chote bachoon ke bhi bache hootehain"? teacher nahin kabhi nahin " boy said to girl-dekha aur tu aise hi dar rahi thi".
Girls Hostel ki light chali gayi.Ek ladki ne electric office me phone karke kaha:Light chali gayi hai, aadmi bhejo.Replied "Aadmi nahi hai, mombatti se kaam chala lo...
75yrz old man got married with a girl of 15 yrz old. At marriage nite they both r crying cuz Girl don"t know anything and an old man hav 4gotten evrythng.
what"s common between the SUN & WOMEN"S UNDERWEAR?1) both are hott2) both look better while going down3) both disappear by night............
Mother to Teenage Daughter : "I think its time that we should talk about SEX."Daughter : "Yes Mom, What do You want to know ?
Man: Kiss Karun?Gal: Lipstick kharab hogi.Man: Boob dabaun.?Gal: T-shirt kharab hogi.?Man: Fuck?Gal: Period me hun.?Man: Don"t say loose motions hai.
main mangta hoon tu dati nahi... jawab meri baat ka.....deti hai to khara ho jata hai...rom rom jazbat ka...kyun keti ho bar bar dalo...baloo main phool gulab ka.....
Girl: Jab hum ladkiya gandi bante karti hai tab tum ladko ke KAN khade ho jate hai..!!
Boy : Oh !! Accha ? To tum log USE kaan kahete ho?
Height of Double Meaning:-Dad went to school to get son"s report card
Busy madam: Abhi NahiDAD: To phir kab aaun mein?Madam: Mere Periods khatam hone ke baad!
Election 2008( Free Tips )Fit Auntiyan chahiye hon to "PPP" join karen!Fit Larkiyan chahiye hon to "PML(Q)" join karein!Londay baazi kerni ho to (MMA) join kareyGand marwa k saudia jana ho to PML(N) join kareyGanduon k hathon katal ho kay bori main marna ho to MQM joinkareyAgar Sirf muth pe guzara kerna ho to Tehreek-e-Insaaf join kareyAur agar in sab ki gand marni ho to army join kare
teacher :kisi aisi cheze ka naam batao jis ka sirf suna ho par dekha na ho
student : teacher behan ka lora
Musharaf Reema ka haath pakar kar bola:
“Aao kamray mein chalain”
Reema; “Ki faida, wardi tey tu Lani Nai.....


Bachey k khatney k waqt nai ko mashwarey diye janey lagey.Chachi Boli: Is k chacha jaisa Nokdar banana.Mami Boli: Is k mama jaisi Gol Topi ho. Nai Dhoti Utha Kar Bola: Aap ki marzi hai ji warna Fashion to yeh chal raha hai.
Nasibo Lal new song..Picho lagya na kar meri jan sajna,ago hel janda a pora saman sajana..picho lagdey nai musalman sajna menu lagna tu ha koi pathan sajna.
Mallika at Airport. Bhikhari: behanji 1 rupiya dedo.Malika gave him 1000 Rs.Secretary: why U gave him 1000 Rs..?Malika: pehli bar kisine behan kaha.

Love is like a "PENT" But friendship is like a "CHADDI", bcoz "PENT" phaat bhee jaee to "CHADDI" Izzat bacha leti hai.. So thanks for being my "Chaddi"
Sardar: Will u merry ,after i die?Wife: No, I will live with my sister.Wife: Will u merry, After i die?Sardar: No, I will also live with my sister.
1 Doctor Mareez k peechay bhaag raha tha..Logon ne poocha Kya hua?
Doctor: 4 baar aisa hua hai..SALA khatnay karwanay aata hai aur baal saaf karwa k bhaag jata hai.
SMILE: S: Sets u free, M: Makes u special, I: Increases ur face value, L: Lifts up ur spirits, E: Erases all ur tensions, So, please keep smiling. 7 Glances= 1 Smile7 Glances= 1 Smile7 smiles =1 meeting7meetings= 1 kiss7 kisses= 1 proposal7 Proposals=1 marriageand that bloody marriage has 777777 problems
Sex is a sensation caused by temptation when a man puts his location in a woman"s destination. Do u get my explanation, or do u need a demonstration?!
A cat and a rooster sat by a lake, the cat fell in the lake, the rooster laughed! LESSON: when theres a wet pussy, there"s a happy cock!
1 day there was tis naked man N elephant, da elephant looks at the naked man 4 a few seconds, then ask da naked man, "HOW CAN U BREATH THRU THAT LITTLE THING?"
Why do men pass gas more than women? Because women won"t shut up long enough to build up pressure.
Today its cool to have small cars and small computers.Soon it will be cool to have a small penis too.then you my friend will be THE MAN!!
A Train is bout2 crash. A frantic virgin strips off n says:"" Can anyone make me feel like a woman b4 I die?""So a man takes off his clothes n say,""Iron these!
Girl to Mom: "Is it true that Babies come out from the same place where Boys put their P---S?"
Mom: "Yes"
Girl: "Wow! My Baby will come out from my mouth"
23 useless parts on a mans body.20 nails u cant hammer.2 balls u cant throw &1 cock that cant "crow" dont laff ladies?? UR PUSSY CANT CATCH MICE
Mobilink regrets 2 inform u that the network has gone down on everyone except u. We regret 2 inform u that no one would go down on u not even a network.
Why do women have orgasms during sex??? It gives them something to moan about even when they are fuc***g enjoyin themselves.
Do you like maths?if so add a bed subtract ur clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!
HOW 2 SATISFY A WOMAN: caress excite cuddle fascinate spoil kiss rub tease pamper console worship respect & love. HOW 2 SATISFY A MAN: blow job.
Old mother Hubbard went 2 d cupboard 2 fetch d poor dog a bone. but when she bent over Rover took over & gave her a bone of his own!
I like your style - I like your class - but most of all i like your arse.
Latest porn releases : shaving private ryan. position impossible. as big as it gets. forest hump. riding miss daisy. starwhores and pornocchio.
Why is Sex a 3 letter word? Its easier to spell than... OHMYGODYESNOOSSHITYESDEEPER-YESGODNOPLEASENOSHITYESOH- SHITFU*KNOYESYESYESSHITOH.
SEASON DHAMAKA OFFERSend your girlfriend to me and win a babyHURRY UPFirst ten will get twins
Hum Gire Hue ko Uthate hai,Hum Bichhde Hue Ko Milate Hai,In Short Hum Bra Banate Hain.
Man: Kiss Karun?Gal: Lipstick kharab hogi.Man: Boob dabaun.?Gal: T-shirt kharab hogi.?Man: Fuck?Gal: Period me hun.?Man: Don"t say loose motions hai.
Never dance naked because the body has parts that do not stop moving when the music stops.
Sex is like NOKIA (connecting people) like NIKE (just do it) like PEPSI(ask for more) like SAMSUNG (everyone is invited) and like ME (TO GOOD TO BETRUE)..

Facts of Life:Ghareeb aur Boobs hamesha dabte hai.Musibat aur penis kabhi bhi khade ho jate hai.Kismat aur Bra kabhi bhi khul sakti hai.
3 sachgareeb or mama hamesha pakda jata hainmasla or lun kahin bi khada ho sakta hiankismat or gand kahin bi khul sakti hayad rakhna
A man wanted 2 get married, He had a choice of 3 women. 1st woz a rich dcotor,2nd woz a poor cleaner & 3rd woz a prostitute. WHO DID HE PICK? The 1 wid big tits!
Today its cool to have small cars and small computers. Soon it will be cool to have a small penis too, then you my friend will be THE MAN!!
I only have SEX on days that begin with T: Thanksgiving. Tuesday. Thursday. Today. Tomorrow. Thaturday. thunday.. Every thucking day!
kuch loag sirf 2 ghantay kertay hain..kuch loag 4 ghantay kartay hain...Aur kuch loag to Poori Poori raat kartay hain.............abbay aapna mobile charge.........
Pehlay kiss karo...phir bister per laitao...phir dono tangein uper kark....thora saa neechay ho ker dheikho...ager BABY ne SOSO kiaya hai too uskapamper change kerdo......
• Pehlay hath mein pakro!.....Phir thook lagao?.....Phir Seedha karo? ?.....Phir andar ghussao???.....Dekha! kitna mushkil hai sui mein dhaga daalna. ;-)
One boy to girl- kitni kaali ho tum.girl-isme tumhare baap ka kya gaya?Boy-agar mere baapka gaya hota to tum itni kaali na hoti.
Doctor: Kya taklif hai? Petient: Sote waqt SAAS ko lene me taqlif hoti hai. Doc:Aaj se dus din sote vaqt SAAS ko nahi SAALI ko lo !!